隆多签约湖人 段子球队不止
拉简-朗多决定加入洛杉矶湖人队，美国著名论坛Reddit网友对此展开热议，精彩评论摘录如下：
[5131赞] [rebel5788 波士顿伯德球迷]
No (cry
不（哭泣表情
回复楼上 [2475 赞] [goofygoober2 凯尔特人球迷]
NOOOOOOOOO RONDO WHYYYYYY
不。。。。。 隆多。。 为什么要这样。。。
回复楼上 [1483赞] [iAmTheRealLange 凯尔特人球迷]
Our boy has grown old and moved far away from home.
孩子长大了，离家越来越远了
回复楼上 [989赞] [DrWolves 森林狼球迷]
To join a King he once fought against
他选择辅佐君王，曾抗争过的那位君王
[6383赞] [Marleau_12 国王队盖伊球迷]
This is the weirdest roster of misfits
这堪称NBA史上最不搭调的一套阵容
回复楼上 [1237赞] [TornadoApe 76人球迷]
It's like the first box on their checklist for signing free agents is "would this guy really annoy LeBron?"
湖人签自由球员的首要准则似乎是"该球员必须能膈应到勒布朗"？
[1258 赞] [gingerbreadloofa 湖人球迷]
Maybe their all assets in a trade for Kawhi?
也许他们都会被打包去交易卡哇伊？
回复楼上 [1939赞] [JCBDoesGaming 克利夫兰奥斯曼球迷]
Rondo, Lance, Javale + a pack of gum for Kawhi, who says no.
隆多、师弟、麦基外加一堆废人去换卡哇伊，嗯没毛病。
回复楼上 [470赞] [ivabra 尼克斯死忠]
Can they actually get traded? Right after being newly signed?
讲真，他们刚被签下，真的可以立刻被打包去换卡哇伊吗？
回复楼上 [1154赞] [JCBDoesGaming 克利夫兰奥斯曼球迷]
No they can't.
并不可以。
回复楼上 [116赞] [itschrisbrah 湖人球迷]
How long until they can? Is it like 6 months or something? I doubt they will just asking what the rule is.
所以要多久才能交易他们？我记得得等上6个月？严重怀疑这几个球员在交易来湖人之前都打听过了。
回复楼上 [233赞] [JMEEKER86 NBA科比球迷]
They'll be eligible to be traded in December.
他们要到12月才能被交易
[3345赞] [Yanns 凯尔特人球迷]
Rondo, JaVale, Lance and LeBron is high comedy
隆多、麦基、师弟和勒布朗在一起简直喜剧效果爆棚
回复楼上 [1295赞] [vznb 尼克斯球迷]
All the Lakers need is Swaggy P to complete the process (of elimination by GSW)
现在湖人只需得到杨少侠，即可实现终极目标（被勇士干掉）
回复楼上 [352赞] [notebear629 勇士利文斯顿球迷]
And then the Warriors swiftly respond by adding Dwight Howard who agrees to play nice on the minimum and Tyreke Evans on the MLE
于是勇士火速用底薪签下霍华德，中产签下埃文斯。且前者允诺即便拿的是底薪也会全力以赴。
回复楼上 [216赞] [Melkor_The_Morgoth 尼克斯球迷]
Or, ya know, fucking Cousins
又或许，你懂的，去勇士的是TM考辛斯呢？
[8523赞] [bobber 湖人鲍尔球迷]
WAIT WTF
We're actually the Tune Squad
擦，稍等
我们仿佛成为了《空中大灌篮》里乔丹的那支球队啊
回复楼上 [4067赞] [custom-concern 老鹰球迷]
I can't believe Lance, Rondo, and Javale Mcgee are all on the same team with Lebron. And there's still Lonzo's dad in the picture
师弟、隆多和麦基和勒布朗同时出现在一支球队，画面太美。别忘了还有球爹在画面外微笑地看着你。
回复楼上 [1689赞] [vizzlypoof 湖人球迷]
If ya'll thought previous Cavs team were a circus, you ain't seen nothing yet.
我们曾以为上赛季的骑士队就是个马戏团，但，我们还是太嫩了
回复楼上 [1201赞] [likekoolaid 勇士巴恩斯球迷]
All defense and passing, no shooters. They're going to try to beat the warriors by straight up tiring them out. It's genius.
全是防守型的，没一个投手。湖人看来想用累垮勇士的方式去击败他们，简直天才。
回复楼上 [420赞] [DearWolf3 森林狼球迷]
LeBron gonna start resting on offense now
勒布朗在进攻端要开始打养生篮球了
回复楼上 [193赞] [Givens_14]
Lakers are gonna try to rest Lebron so much that they get the 8 seed and go all in on trying to make the first round their finals against the Warriors, with Lebron on the freshest legs possible.
湖人的战术会是这样的：让勒布朗休息充足，保证常规赛结束后拿到西部第八，然后在勒布朗体力最充足的时候打勇士，把第一轮当总决赛打。
回复DearWolf3 [295赞] [JayGeezy1]
They're going to play like Spain against Russia this past weekend except like Spain on O, Russia on D.
湖人会打得和西班牙对俄罗斯的那场世界杯一样。只是要刨去西班牙的进攻，以及俄罗斯的防守。
回复楼上 [172赞] [TheSufferingPariah 公牛球迷]
Can't miss a shot if you never take one.
你永远不可能投失。只要你从不出手（滑稽
[1767赞] [PSUDolphins 76人球迷]
The fucking meme team continues
尼玛的这支段子球队持续进化中
回复楼上 [1265赞] [twistedlogicx 哈士奇球迷]
Pelinka: "Magic, what are we gonna do now that Paul George is re-signing with OKC?"
Magic: "Kill them with memes."
佩琳卡："魔术师，保罗乔治和雷霆续约了，咋整？"
魔术师："用段子灭了他们"
回复bobber [495赞] [stayingup2date]
When this all comes to an end we'll know if Magic is a wizard or just a fucking lunatic.
等所有硝烟散尽，我们就能知道魔术（师）到底是个奇才，还是个tmd傻比
回复楼上 [690赞] [勇士利文斯顿球迷]
I'm pretty sure Magic is a laker, not a wizard
我很确信魔术（师）是个湖人，不是个奇才
回复楼上 [312赞] [UtahJazz420 爵士球迷]
Pretty sure Magic is the Orlando based NBA team, not a Lakers.
我很确信魔术是一支位于奥兰多的NBA球队，不是湖人。
回复楼上 [208赞] [奇才马辛米球迷]
Pretty sure the Magic are a D league team, not an nba team
我很确认魔术是一支发展联盟球队，不是NBA球队
回复楼上 [121赞] [魔术球迷]
That hurts man. It's true, but it still hurts.
扎心了老铁。你说的是真话，但真话伤人。
[1891赞] [HumanHitsick21 雷霆威少球迷]
WHAT IS THIS TEAM
这 是 什 么 里 个 球 队
回复楼上 [1219赞] [DavidKirk2000 猛龙瓦兰球迷]
LeBron's greatest hits all compiled into one team.
勒布朗生涯至今最热门段子对象都被整到一支队伍里来了
回复楼上 [658赞] [joinedreditjusttoask 骑士球迷]
J-joakim Noah to Lakers...?
诺。。诺阿次日宣布加盟湖人。。？
回复楼上 [415赞] [anglesideside1]
Oh maw gawd! That's Delonte West's theme music!!!
噢天呐，我仿佛听到了德隆蒂-维斯特的主题曲正在奏响！！
[7259赞] [twistedlogicx 哈士奇球迷]
Lakers just need Melo now and they can compete for the 2008 championship.
湖人队还差一个甜瓜，就可以为2008年总冠军而战了
回复楼上 [1653赞] [98rman 骑士罗斯球迷]
10 year old Lonzo and 11 year old BI would be something
10岁的球哥和11岁的莺歌应该是个狠角色
回复楼上 [1141赞] [copper_tone 雷霆球迷]
The word you're looking for is liabilities on defense.
你口中所谓"狠角色"应该是指"防守端的大漏勺"？
回复楼上 [437赞] [untrained 湖人科比球迷]
To be fair ingram was a 9 foot tall sea monster already at age 11
讲道理，莺歌11岁的时候就已经是个3米巨怪了
[1811赞] [ImXavierr 老鹰球迷]
he wasn't lying when he said he wanted to play off ball more. Rondo is about to average 30 assists this year
勒布朗说过他想打更多的无球，现在看来不是说说的。下赛季隆多可能每场平均助攻能上30。
回复楼上 [603赞] [SloatThritter 湖人球迷]
I wonder how filthy an off ball James can be. I don't think i can remember the last time he took a three point shot in the corner off of a pass.
我好奇一个打无球的勒布朗杀伤力会有多大。已经记不清上次他站在底角接球投三分是什么时候的事儿了。
回复楼上 [224赞] [WilliamisMiB 湖人球迷]
Yea last time I remember it is 2012 when Bosh and Wade would ball out on top of key sometimes and someone would forget about Lebron. In Cleveland you wouldn't even see that when kyrie drove because he was too fast for 4s to effectively crash on him from Lebron
是啊，我记得上次看到这一场景还是在2012年左右，波什和韦德有时会在罚球线顶弧单打，对方球员协防有时就会疏忽对勒布朗的防守。而在骑士队就很少见，因为欧文持球突破的速度实在太快，对方4号位还没给他压力通常他就已经得分了。
[1719赞] [Brad-Stevens 凯尔特人球迷]
MORE BAD SHOOTERS FOR BRON
勒布朗现在身边聚集了更多篮子不准的球员
回复楼上 [247赞] [JimHarden 火箭阿里扎球迷]
Seriously, I feel like this team is being built from scratch and it's still a terrible fit. I guess it's all one year deals but still
讲真，我感觉这支球队满满的临时拼凑感，而且就目前阵容来看还是不太搭调。虽然好几名球员可能都是一年合同，但仍旧怪怪的
回复楼上 [142赞] [Anti-Thon 雷霆威少球迷]
I mean, yeah, they have a number of above average passers
LeBron, Lance, Rondo, Lonzo and Ingram (this is what a Laker fan would tell you)
but in today's NBA, you need to be able to shoot and space the floor
我想说的是，好吧，湖人现在的确有好几个传球好手
勒布朗、师弟、隆多、球哥和莺歌（相信至少湖人球迷会这么为他们辩护）
但，在今天的NBA联盟，你的球员需要有篮子，能拉开空间才行啊
回复楼上 [271赞] [雷霆球迷]
12 passes around the perimeter and then a jacked up airball 3: Your 2018-2019 Los Angeles LAKERS!
三分线外12次传导，然后一个三不沾的3分出手：你们的新赛季湖人队！
回复楼上 [117赞] [fuckupdog 奇才球迷]
Ah the Spain approach
啊，熟悉的西班牙队的味道
来源：reddit | 欧芹 编译